The Unknown Candidate: Penises & Politics

Saturday, October 07, 2006

Penises & Politics

Great article by Larry Beinhart. Must read.

Let's Face It, Penises Dominate American Politics
By Larry Beinhart, BuzzFlash.

Americans entering politics should not worry if they commit war crimes; the key to survival is to leave your sex organs at home before you do battle in Congress.

Thank God for Mark Foley.

It proves that the American people still care about something.

It happens to be penises. But still.

They care about who talks about them, who plays with them, who covers them up, who uncovers them, who covers up the uncovering of them.

Even Jon Stewart put the big penis cover-up ahead of the fact that this government just passed a law that says that George Bush can say, "Hey you, you're an enemy combatant, "and once he says that they can whisk you away.

This is literally true. It's like that joke in the first grade.
Make me a milkshake

Poof: You're a milkshake
If George Bush says: you're an enemy combatant. Poof! You are one. And then they can take you to Guantanamo, do not pass go, do not call your attorney, do not see a judge, do not hear the charges against you, go straight to the cage they want to put you in. The cage comes with lights that stay on 24 hours a day and wake-up calls every fifteen minutes so you never get to sleep and special exercise programs where you stand for hours in 'stress' positions, upward screaming cat, squatting tortured turtle, and other lite abuses that used to quaintly prohibited by the Geneva Conventions.

Today's joke:
Q: What do Americans do after they commit war crimes?

A: They pass a law that says they can't be prosecuted for committing war crimes.
If you don't find that funny, if you actually think that's serious, then I ask you come nobody else does. How come CNN doesn't care, NBC, the NY Times? How come the Democratic leadership doesn't care?

How did that that bill -- that contains all those provisions and more -- got passed without a filibuster? Without a fuss?

Thank God for Mark Foley. An old congressman hitting on teenage boys, that's real news.

MUST READ more here.

Photo credit: Former Rep. Mark Foley, R-FL, in Washington in 2005. A US House of Representatives ethics panel launched an investigation into a sex scandal that has rocked President George W. Bush's Republican party ahead of key elections next month. (AFP/Getty Images/File/Joe Raedle)